Although I vowed not to watch Twilight, I did last Friday night with Inca and Acey after our chorale practice for the upcoming Christmas party. Inca asking me to watch with her (and the fact that she'll be gone come January) was one reason to go. The other was my curiosity due to A's reaction to the movie - a sort of high feeling you get after as described.

The movie was okay. I thought it was interesting enough. True, some scenes were a tad too emo for me. True again to the vast feedback that I hear about how the vampires were just too pale to blend in and not be regarded as a walking corpse, anemic or just albino-ish. But for someone who didn't read the book (I don't think I will. I don't read romance novels) and someone who heard guys bash the movie, I thought it was entertaining enough for the 170 Pesos I paid.

What I find weird though is despite the gasps for breath and the sighs of love by my fellow moviegoers, I on the other hand did not get that tingly feeling. I didn't feel the sparks of romance. No buzz or light-headed anticipation. Sure it is a movie made to target the ladies but I just thought that "hey it is something romantic, at least I should FEEL something right?".

WRONG.

Yup I did feel something all right, but it was the total opposite of romance. I just felt heavy and sad after. I pan through the scenes of the movie once more to think of the source of this feeling but nothing really stands out save for one line:

"I don't have the strength to stay away from you anymore"

I guess maybe looking back at things (my life), I think I wish that I had the strength to stay away... not because that I didn't love... but because controlling myself maybe could have been for the best... because maybe in the end I just hurt the ones I love :(

I guess I can be excused for the emoness, after all I am writing about Twilight. Haha.